Wednesday, August 23, 2006


Don't Panic...

This is not a post about God, Jesus, or seven days of work, blah blah blah. This post is devoted mainly to Margot's Mama. The other day, I was watching Margot playing with her weeble village and couldn't help but notice how perfect she is. Now when I say "perfect", I don't mean she is the end all be all of children. There are other kids out there just as cute, just as smart, and just as sweet tempered.

But they don't belong to me. I didn't make those babies. I made mine.

She is so perfect. Her little hands crease in the same places my hands crease. Her ears are mirror images of my own, just scaled down. I look into her eyes and see my own, minus the worry, grief, and responsibilities I have accumulated over the years. Those big toes that have crazy, sickle shaped nails. I wonder, someday will she be as frustrated trying to paint those as I am? I notice the most minute details about her and marvel at the fact that I had a hand in them. When I was pregnant, I doubted that my body could actually make a baby, let alone such a perfect one.

A mother's love for her child is a bond that can't be expressed in a second rate picture blog. Sometimes I wish I could chronicle these feelings for Margot so when she grows up, she can have some sort of idea about how becoming her Mama changed me. To let her know, that if she is worried about what kind of parent she will be, she is not alone. Nature will take care of the biggest part. Her amazing body will take care of the second biggest part. All that will be left for her to do is love, which will be pretty simple.


auntekalurah said...

Gosh darnitt, woman! Every time I read your blog you have me crying. The last one about Ben and Father's Day sent me completely over the edge.You guys are doing such a wonderful job with Margot. Every time I get to see her she is just the happiest child I've seen.She's lucky to have such loving parents as you and Ben.Keep up the good work!

sonny and stacy said...

You are a wonderful mom Lauren. I wish we lived closer so I could see you with your daughter!!!

sonny and stacy said...

OH yeah!!! Tell Kalurah I would love to see pictures of my little cousins from over there too!!!

I love you guys!!!

Casey said...

Isnt is amazing to watch a child like that? I enjoy looking at my girls too!

You are such a awesome mom Lauren!